Am I the only one of my friends without fake boobs?

“I’m starting to wonder if I’m the only one of my friends without fake boobs.”

This hot weather has meant more pool time with my nearest and dearest. And the more I see my network in swimmers, the more I die, because they are looking smashing and I’m getting the feeling that something’s changed.

I think I’m the only one who didn’t bring an extra pair of ‘floaties’ to the party.

I hadn’t invited my friends, the ‘twins’.

Enough innuendo (despite having another hilarious line about puppies…): I have a feeling I’m the only one of my friends without fake boobs.

I think I’m the only one who didn’t bring an extra pair of ‘floaties’ to the party (Image:iStock)
I think I’m the only one who didn’t bring an extra pair of ‘floaties’ to the party (Image:iStock)

Let’s get this straight – I’m all about choice. If you want them, you’ve researched your options and you’re comfy, go for it. More power and convenient options at Bras N Things to you

I’m just wondering when it transitioned from knowing a few who chose to supersize, to everyone except me? Well, that’s what it feels like.

According to my poolside research, it was a post-children decision for one friend who had “given her body” to her three kids and wanted “something back” for herself.

It was “tough to fit into the budget” but she’d “never been happier”. Although stoked, it’s not something she openly tells people. Her opinion was that if someone asked she might disclose, but generally its no-one else’s business.

Another friend was desperate for a boob job for most of her ’20s; it was something she “always felt self-conscious about.”

She got a second job to pay for them and even had a ‘Boobie bye-bye’ party to celebrate the last day of being au naturel. She was loud and proud about her decision, I admired her for that.

I was floored when one friend said she went overseas for her new set as “it was so much cheaper”.

Something about a ‘sale’ and cosmetic surgery doesn’t sit well with me, but she was confident she researched thoroughly and just tied in a ‘nip and tuck’ with her holiday. She returned home with more than a huge smile and a tan.

"One of my friends confessed she'd "always felt self conscious" about her breasts." (Image: iStock)
“One of my friends confessed she’d “always felt self conscious” about her breasts.” (Image: iStock)

Stretching my research beyond the poolside chatter, experts say cosmetic surgery has never been more popular, but that’s hard to gauge here in Oz.

The Australian Society of Plastic Surgeons says no-one knows exactly how much cosmetic surgery is being performed in Australia, as national statistics for the industry are not collected yet.

Most cosmetic surgery is elective and not covered by Medicare, and therefore is hard to track.

If my poolside survey of a niche select group is even near the ballpark and cosmetic surgery is becoming more and more popular, my advice is: be smart about it.

My small boobs

All the chicks I know hit ‘refresh’ for different reasons. But they were all united by one thing – they knew unequivocally what they wanted.

It’s more than just altering your body; they waded through budgeting for it and mentally preparing themselves for the reaction of others. And it’s not as easy as the cosmetic apps make it seem.


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